And So It Goes…

Congress Calls for Action from White House
(Washington, D.C., Tuesday) – Members of Congress today demanded that President Obama take immediate action against militant Islamic extremists in Iraq and Syria.

“Congress and the American people are sick and tired of waiting for this namby-pamby, mumble-jumble President to get off his duff and deal with ISIS,” fumed Republican House Speaker John Boehner. “President Obama’s inability to come with a plan to halt ISIS, trumpets his lack of resolve to terrorists everywhere.”

Senate Republican Minority Leader Mitch McConnell had equally harsh words.

“ISIS cannot be managed,” McConnell said. “This is not a group of unruly youngsters who will listen to reason if given a ‘time out’ and deprived of their X-Box playing privileges. Obama had the authority to order air strikes against ISIS in Iraq, and we’re ready, willing and able to extend that authority to Syria.”

Republican Senator Lindsay Graham chimed in.

“Destroy them today,” Graham exhorted. “By tomorrow, they’ll be attacking American toddlers on our neighborhood playgrounds.”


Obama Announces Strong Measures to Curb ISIS
(Washington, D.C., Wednesday) – Responding to mounting cries to stop ISIS, President Obama today announced plans to reinforce troops in Iraq and step up air strikes against the extremist group.

“Effective immediately, we will send an additional 1,000 members of our military to safeguard our interests in that country and to seal off the Syrian border,” the President stated. “This will stem the flow of personnel and materials to ISIS forces in Iraq, which will be found and eliminated.”

“Manned and unmanned airstrikes against ISIS targets in both Iraq and Syria will be increased to whatever level necessary to accomplish our goals,” the President added.

Congress Calls for Caution from White House
(Washington, D.C., Thursday) – Members of Congress today demanded that President Obama exercise restraint in taking action against militant Islamic extremists in the Middle East.

“Congress and the American people are sick and tired of paying the price for actions taken by this reckless, motormouth President and his shoot-from-the-hip confrontations with ISIS,” fumed Republican House Speaker John Boehner. “President Obama’s detailing of his plans to halt ISIS trumpets an alert to terrorists everywhere.”

Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell had equally harsh words.

“ISIS can easily be managed,” McConnell said. “This is nothing more than a group of unruly youngsters who will listen to reason if given a ‘time out’ and deprived of their X-Box playing privileges. Obama does not have the authority to conduct airstrikes on Syrian territory, and he would be unwise to carry out that threat.”

Republican Senator Lindsay Graham chimed in.

“Talk to them today,” Graham exhorted. “By tomorrow, they’ll be our friends and allies, eager to help us spread our vision of Democracy throughout the region.”

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